Your Divorce Advisor : A Lawyer and a Psychologist GuideYou Through the Legal and Emotional Landscape of Divorce
November 27th, 2009 by admin | Filed under divorce.
Review
Louis Parley author of The Ethical Family Lawyer Your Divorce Advisor is the most comprehensive divorce book on the market. It covers the legal issues extensively and is the only book to also tell you what you can expect to feel along the way. It offers an invaluable strategy for coping with the emotional demands of divorce, and has the best advice on talking with your kids about the divorce that I’ve read anywhere. It is the one book I will recommend to my divorcing clients. — Review
Review
Janet JohnstonExecutive Director, Judith Wallerstein Center for the Family in Transition, and author of In the Name of the Child Your Divorce Advisor, written by a seasoned lawyer-and-psychologist team, is a gem [Read More...]
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I bought this book post divorce, a mistake equivalent to waiting until after a bad operation to check out your doctor’s credentials with the AMA or state medical board.
It hardly needs be said that as far as life altering events go, both marriage and divorce present potential short/long term repercussions. To move into either of these arenas without having first educated yourself to the negative implications is probably the most common mistake made in our society today.
Still, while the typical no-fault divorce in a joint property jurisdiction is a cut and dry event, there are areas - emotional, intellectual, and financial, that you need to explore in advance and this book can help you to accomplish that. Even if there are painful or unresolved issues that linger after the decree is final, you can gain insights here as to legal strategies that may help, or other practical guidance if acceptance is the only option.
Unlike some of the other books I’ve read on this subject, “Your Divorce Advisor” does not appear to have a gender bias or other transparent agendas. Working together, Mercer and Pruett help you to gain a bit of distance from your own situation, while offering objective advice toward gaining fair and effective closure.
This book does a fine job of capturing the circumstances that I imagine might be faced by 90% of all respondents. Even if you have a very unusual situation, the general advice available here is valuable. I had particular concerns when I bought the book, and I found viable answers and explanations contained therein. They may not have been what I was hoping for, but as the basic theme of this book expounds, getting realistic about divorce and its aftermath is step one in the mutli-part process of a successful separation.
I found the combination of interweaving comments from an attorney and a psychologist to be very effective and was very encouraged as I began reading. As I progressed, however, I became somewhat disappointed for several different reasons and these reasons may not apply to other people (so take my rating with a grain of salt). First, a huge proportion of the book is dedicated to issues of childcare and child custody so for those of us without children, it’s as if we bought a book that only has 60% of its content directed towards us. In this light, I thought that some of the financial issues were shortchanged a bit. Second, it seemed like a disproportionate amount of the material was directed specifically (or at least primarily) towards wives. Finally, I would have liked to have seen more attention paid to situations where there may be substantial issues of emotional problems and/or mental illness. Those exceptions aside, though, I thought this was a very well-done book.
I bought this book after reading 5 or 6 other books, and none of those other books covered divorce from start to finish as well as this one did. From the finances to figuring out whether you’re emotionally ready to deal with the issues, I found it really helpful. Definitely worth the price. I even lent it to my lawyer.